50 Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts
Appendix A: Addenda and Errata
Appendix B
Appendix C: 50 Things Kleenexwoman, 12th level chaotic neutral mage, is not allowed to do at Hogwarts
Appendix D
Appendix E: 101 things haldirsbitch is not allowed to do at Hogwarts
Appendix F
Appendix G: Yet More Errata and Even More Addenda
ETA:Appendix I
Errata-
Sirius Black is not 24601.
Nymphadora Tonks does not have "one dot in Vicissitude".
I am not to Polyjuice myself into John DeLancie and Apparate into a Star Trek convention.
The headmaster is not to be referred to as "the nearly dead Dumbledore", nor does he require a "stand without effort" spell.
No picking roses in the Forbidden Forest.
I am not to sing "Tea and Corpses" in front of Professor Snape. It might give him ideas.
seawolf10's addenda-
Not allowed to introduce myself to the first years as "Tim the Enchanter."
No calling Draco "the foulest, most vicious rodent ever to walk the earth."
Under no circumstances am I to attempt to create a Holy Hand Grenade.
liasyuimackwell's addenda-
I will not use the Imperius curse pn Professor Snape forcing him to go about in a French Maid's outfit.
- Or fishnets, stilletos and a corset.
I will not teach Harry and Draco how to sing "Party For Two".
I will not invite Ron Weasley to visit the home of my Muggle family for a private screening of "Eight Legged Freaks."
Rev. First Speaker Schol-R-LEA;2's addenda-
codicil to "We do not serve Muggle stew for any meal"(qzee):
-Nor do we serve Muggle stools, no matter what the chipped beef on toast
is often referred to.
Attempting to forge a runesword is a bad idea.
- Attempting to forge the headmaster's signature on important documents
is also unwise.
I am not a Jedi Master, a Pokemon Master, a Shaolin Master, or a Master
of the Obvious.
I will not Polyjuice myself and a confederate to look like Harry Potter
and Ron Weasley, then give each other passionate kisses in public.
- the same goes for Hermione Granger and Ginny Weasley, Harry Potter and
Draco Malfoy, or most especially, Professor Snape and Lucius Malfoy.
Forming a LGBT support group on campus is permissible. Claiming that it
was founded in 1945 by Tom Riddle is not.
There are no classes in Tantra at Hogwarts, and claiming there are to visitors is wholly inappropriate.
Ollivander's does not sell Hitachi Magic Wands, not even to special
customers.
- Buying one from Lovecraft or Good Vibrations and attempting to use it
for classwork is in poor taste.
A gift certificate to The Tantric Voyager or similar shops is not an
appropriate gift to either professors or fellow students.
- No matter how much they need it.
- Giving one to one of the house ghosts is needlessly cruel.
- So is giving one to Peeves, though in that case it is cruel to
everyone else.
Charming Umbridge's quill so that it affects her instead is extremely rude.
- No matter how much she deserves it.
Attempting to sell your soul to the Dark Lord is forbidden.
- So is selling anyone else's soul.
Legilimency has nothing to do with whether your parents are lawfully married or not.
mari_mac1109's addenda-
I am not to suggest to Professor Trelawney that we do strip tarot readings.
-Even if my Divinations partner is a fit Quidditch bloke.
-I am also not to convince firsties that tarot can only be read in this manner.
-Especially if I have tampered with the deck.
-Also, I shall not insinuate that any of my professors do strip tarot readings in the staff room.
-Especially McGonagall.
I am not to refer to the Room of Requirement as 'Roxie's Sex Shop' under any circumstances.
-Even if it is true.
-Should it be true, I am not to peddle goods to my classmates.
-Even/especially if enchanted.
I am not allowed to edit the Sirius Black Wanted posters to read "Sirius Black, Wanted for XXX Action: ASAP, Prefects Bathroom."
-Especially if signed "XOXO, Sevvie."
I shall always remember that wizard photographs move and that this includes pornography, which as established, is crude and severely punishable.
I shall not try to pass of any Potions assignment as Extra Strength Claritin.
I am not allowed to use Polyjuice potion to assume the form of any professor.
-And then beat them to their room before class and demand why they're there.
-Nor am I to to approach McGonagall as Snape and tell her that I want her hot, hot sex.
I am not Xena: Warrior Princess and I shall not use war cries to signal my entrance into any classroom.
The house elves are not the Keebler elves, despite the fact that they make yummy sweets.
Send any future contributions to ladylilyfox@yahoo.com.
The "50 Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts" CafePress store
The 50 Things Annex
and introducing The 50 Things One-Liners Store! Got a favorite to suggest? Comment or email! If it's from the addenda, please name the contributor.
New items added all the time!
HoneyB is writing What Not to do at Hogwarts, give it a look!
Also, snazzy new "50 Things" icons!
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
kurasxlyrics has made some wonderful colorful icons, and rictusempra_ has made rather a lot of lovely icons, some of which are animated.
Appendix A: Addenda and Errata
Appendix B
Appendix C: 50 Things Kleenexwoman, 12th level chaotic neutral mage, is not allowed to do at Hogwarts
Appendix D
Appendix E: 101 things haldirsbitch is not allowed to do at Hogwarts
Appendix F
Appendix G: Yet More Errata and Even More Addenda
ETA:Appendix I
Errata-
Sirius Black is not 24601.
Nymphadora Tonks does not have "one dot in Vicissitude".
I am not to Polyjuice myself into John DeLancie and Apparate into a Star Trek convention.
The headmaster is not to be referred to as "the nearly dead Dumbledore", nor does he require a "stand without effort" spell.
No picking roses in the Forbidden Forest.
I am not to sing "Tea and Corpses" in front of Professor Snape. It might give him ideas.
seawolf10's addenda-
Not allowed to introduce myself to the first years as "Tim the Enchanter."
No calling Draco "the foulest, most vicious rodent ever to walk the earth."
Under no circumstances am I to attempt to create a Holy Hand Grenade.
liasyuimackwell's addenda-
I will not use the Imperius curse pn Professor Snape forcing him to go about in a French Maid's outfit.
- Or fishnets, stilletos and a corset.
I will not teach Harry and Draco how to sing "Party For Two".
I will not invite Ron Weasley to visit the home of my Muggle family for a private screening of "Eight Legged Freaks."
Rev. First Speaker Schol-R-LEA;2's addenda-
codicil to "We do not serve Muggle stew for any meal"(qzee):
-Nor do we serve Muggle stools, no matter what the chipped beef on toast
is often referred to.
Attempting to forge a runesword is a bad idea.
- Attempting to forge the headmaster's signature on important documents
is also unwise.
I am not a Jedi Master, a Pokemon Master, a Shaolin Master, or a Master
of the Obvious.
I will not Polyjuice myself and a confederate to look like Harry Potter
and Ron Weasley, then give each other passionate kisses in public.
- the same goes for Hermione Granger and Ginny Weasley, Harry Potter and
Draco Malfoy, or most especially, Professor Snape and Lucius Malfoy.
Forming a LGBT support group on campus is permissible. Claiming that it
was founded in 1945 by Tom Riddle is not.
There are no classes in Tantra at Hogwarts, and claiming there are to visitors is wholly inappropriate.
Ollivander's does not sell Hitachi Magic Wands, not even to special
customers.
- Buying one from Lovecraft or Good Vibrations and attempting to use it
for classwork is in poor taste.
A gift certificate to The Tantric Voyager or similar shops is not an
appropriate gift to either professors or fellow students.
- No matter how much they need it.
- Giving one to one of the house ghosts is needlessly cruel.
- So is giving one to Peeves, though in that case it is cruel to
everyone else.
Charming Umbridge's quill so that it affects her instead is extremely rude.
- No matter how much she deserves it.
Attempting to sell your soul to the Dark Lord is forbidden.
- So is selling anyone else's soul.
Legilimency has nothing to do with whether your parents are lawfully married or not.
mari_mac1109's addenda-
I am not to suggest to Professor Trelawney that we do strip tarot readings.
-Even if my Divinations partner is a fit Quidditch bloke.
-I am also not to convince firsties that tarot can only be read in this manner.
-Especially if I have tampered with the deck.
-Also, I shall not insinuate that any of my professors do strip tarot readings in the staff room.
-Especially McGonagall.
I am not to refer to the Room of Requirement as 'Roxie's Sex Shop' under any circumstances.
-Even if it is true.
-Should it be true, I am not to peddle goods to my classmates.
-Even/especially if enchanted.
I am not allowed to edit the Sirius Black Wanted posters to read "Sirius Black, Wanted for XXX Action: ASAP, Prefects Bathroom."
-Especially if signed "XOXO, Sevvie."
I shall always remember that wizard photographs move and that this includes pornography, which as established, is crude and severely punishable.
I shall not try to pass of any Potions assignment as Extra Strength Claritin.
I am not allowed to use Polyjuice potion to assume the form of any professor.
-And then beat them to their room before class and demand why they're there.
-Nor am I to to approach McGonagall as Snape and tell her that I want her hot, hot sex.
I am not Xena: Warrior Princess and I shall not use war cries to signal my entrance into any classroom.
The house elves are not the Keebler elves, despite the fact that they make yummy sweets.
Send any future contributions to ladylilyfox@yahoo.com.
The "50 Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts" CafePress store
The 50 Things Annex
and introducing The 50 Things One-Liners Store! Got a favorite to suggest? Comment or email! If it's from the addenda, please name the contributor.
New items added all the time!
HoneyB is writing What Not to do at Hogwarts, give it a look!
Also, snazzy new "50 Things" icons!
kurasxlyrics has made some wonderful colorful icons, and rictusempra_ has made rather a lot of lovely icons, some of which are animated.10 comments | Leave a comment